Martha Bondi

MArtha hot

excellent, martha, excellent

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Mr. Bondi is orange

Martha was an excellent realtor and I got the home I always wanted.

"Man, I've gotten so famous lately that I can't even walk around outside anymore without people tryin' to ask for my autograph! I'm thinkin' maybe I need a bodyguard or somethin'! For real!" "I ain't just a legend in the fighting world, ya know. I'm also well-known in biker circles! Prolly considered the top biker in America! But I got my sights set even higher! One day, I'll..." "Achoo!" "Wataaah!" "Candy's really into gardening lately. Ya know those little onion-lookin' things? They kinda look like me? Oh yeah! Bulbs! So, she planted a buncha bulbs in the garden, see? An' before long..." "So I was wonderin'... What's the difference between an ocean an' a sea, anyway? Is it just about size? Does the location matter? Can a sea get promoted to an ocean if it tries really hard?" "Wanna know what I like most about Candy? Too bad! That's top-secret privileged information, bub! I don't want you fallin' in love with her, too! Not that you could compete, but still..." "I drove to China on my bike the other day. What? I ain't lyin', man! I never lie! I totally drove there on my bike! Don't believe me? Check a map! I'll retrace my steps for ya!" "There ain't nothin' I like more than a nice custom bike. It ain't just about the obvious stuff like color and shape, either. Ya gotta worry about the overall balance an' make sure it looks..." "Why do women take so long to shop, anyway? Don't tell Candy I said this, but that girl took, like, 2 hours to decide between a couple of blouses that were the exact same color! No difference!" "Hobbies? Karaoke, baby! Can't get enough of it! One time Candy an' me, we rented out a karaoke box for a whole week! That was a blast! We're still payin' the owner for the busted speakers..."

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INT. THE VAN – DAY Uncle Grandpa sits behind the wheel of the van. He swerves wildly. UNCLE GRANDPA We’re here! EXT. BOWLING LANES – DAY The van CRASHES right into the bowling lanes. The s Uncle Grandpa’s leans out of the intercom and prods a bowling ball on the calendar hanging from the wall. INT. PIZZA STEVE’S BEDROOM – DAY The doors to the wardrobe are wide open. It looks like there has been an explosion in a pizza topping outfits factory! Pizza Steve admires himself in the full length mirror in his new outfit with extra pepperoni, chicken and broccoli. PIZZA STEVE I like it! Pepperoni, chicken and broccoli! Pizza Steve twirls in front of the mirror, he looks back over his shoulder to see he is now wearing Uncle Grandpa’s face! PIZZA STEVE Uncle Grandpa?! UNCLE GRANDPA Hey Pizza Steve! It’s bowling night! PIZZA STEVE I know! I invented Bowling night! Pizza Steve points and winks at his reflection. PIZZA STEVE Hey Uncle G, you look awesome when I wear you! EXT. MR. GUS’ ROOM – DAY Uncle Grandpa flies a tiny plane around Mr. Gus’s face, Godzilla style! He shouts down his megaphone. UNCLE GRANDPA Hey, Mr. Gus! It’s bowling night! Mr Gus looks down at his matador outfit. He scratches his head. MR GUS I thought it was matador night? UNCLE GRANDPA Nope, that’s tomorrow! MR GUS When is supersized sling-shot night then?! UNCLE GRANDPA That was yesterday! EXT. HILLS – FLASHBACK – DAY Mr Gus screams as he flies through the air over tre BELLY BAG Nicely done Uncle Grandpa! UNCLE GRANDPA Thanks! Your turn, Belly bag! Uncle Grandpa’s head rolls into the ball rack. Belly Bag picks it up. He squares his sights on the pins. He rolls Uncle Grandpa’s head down the lane and scores another full strike! The lights flash. BELLY BAG Another head-in-one! Oh yeah! MR GUS Wow! Pizza Steve stares intensely at his own reflection in a wellpolished bowling ball. He glances up. PIZZA STEVE What happened?! I was too busy looking at this awesome guy right here! Pizza Steve looks back at his reflection and winks. Uncle Grandpa picks up his head from the ball rack and POPS it back on. UNCLE GRANDPA Your turn, Giant Realistic Flying Tiger! Giant Realistic Flying Tiger effortlessly turns her head towards the pins and ROARS, a blood-curdling roar. The bowling pins tremble, they SCREAM and run away in fear! It’s another full strike! The lights flash! UNCLE GRANDPA Wow, that was awesome! It’s your turn Mr Gus! Mr Gus positions himself at the top of the lane. He narrows his eyes, squaring the bowling pins in his sights. He throws the ball with all his might! The ball speeds down the lane like a cannonball. It RIPS through the back wall, knocking it flat! Surprised faces peer in from the parking lot. Only one single solitary pin still stands all on its own. Mr Gus face-palms. MR GUS You have got to be kidding! THE END

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣦⣤⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢡⣤⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠜⢾⡟ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠿⠃⠄ ⠀⠀⠈⠀⠉⠉⠑⠀⠀⠠⢈⣆ ⠀⠀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣷⠃⢵ ⠐⠰⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢟⣽⣆⠀⢃ ⠰⣾⣶⣤⡼⢳⣦⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⠞ ⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠙⠁ ⠀⠀⡐⠘⣿⣿⣯⠿⠛⣿⡄ ⠀⠀⠁⢀⣄⣄⣠⡥⠔⣻⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⣛⣿⣟⣖⢭⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣽⡇ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣇ ⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⡀⠸⣿⣿⡏ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠇⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⡿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇ ⠀⣠⣴⣿⡿⠟⠀⠀⢸⣿⣷ ⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈